Contact Us

Twerking Isn’t Really Illegal In South Louisiana, But Here Are 12 Things That Should Be

Neilson Barnard, Getty Images

In case you missed it, a pretty terribly written piece of fake journalism circulated today claiming that “twerking” was outlawed in the town of DeQuincy, Louisiana. While the story is obviously not true, it definitely got us thinking about things that actually SHOULD be illegal in DeQuincy, and all parts of South Louisiana.

In reality, it would be pretty tough to make the following list of things “illegal,” it doesn’t stop us from imagining how much better a world – particularly a South Louisiana world – would be if indeed the following were outlawed.

Chances are, if you’re from Cajun Country, you will wholeheartedly agree with this list… or at least have a good laugh. Either way, check out 12 things that SHOULD be illegal in South Louisiana.

Speed Traps On The Atchafalaya Basin Bridge

Sean Gallup, Getty Images

Truthfully, speeding traps should be outlawed altogether – but in all honesty, it would probably just take things from bad to worse. With that said – is it just us, or is the basin bridge THE WORST when it comes to speed traps? I guess it would be easier to just slow down, but its soooooooo long.

Roundabouts

Oli Scarff, Getty Images

We totally get the productive purpose of roundabouts – but that productivity goes straight out of the window when no one understands how roundabouts actually work. Bring back 4-way stops until we learn how to have nice things.

Lovebugs

Wikipedia

Whats the point? Seriously? They ruin our front bumpers, and cookouts. They get in our faces and sometimes they even touch our lips (gross!). Would anyone really be upset if these creatures just went away? Didn’t think so.

Dallas Cowboys Fans

Ronald Martinez, Getty Images

Any Dallas Cowboys fan from South Louisiana is either a fan because Dallas was ridiculously good when it was hard to be a Saints fan, or they are just holding on to the past. Either way, it should illegal to be a Cowboys fan in Louisiana – especially if you live south of Alexandria. Most of them would probably rather live in Texas anyway.

Roger Goodell

Al Belio, Getty Images

While we’re on the topic of the NFL, this dude shouldn’t be allowed to step foot on Louisiana soil. The reasons are pretty self-explanatory. #NeverForget

Unseasoned Crawfish

Chris Graythen, Getty Images

Sure, it may seem petty to outlaw unseasoned crawfish — but anyone who has ever been subjected to this culinary travesty will agree. It just ain’t right. Pas Bon.

Ordinances Against Go-Cups

Ryan Pierse, Getty Images

It’s one of the great things that makes South Louisiana an awesome place to live, love, laugh and do just about anything else. Put a to-go cup in our hands and our darkest days are instantly brightened. Especially in downtown areas where people frequent the amazing bars in their town. We’re looking at you Joey Durel ;)

Public Restaurants With No Tony Chachere’s At The Table

Tony Chachere’s

“Great on everything” isn’t just a suggestion. It’s gospel truth. So every public restaurant should be required by law to have a can of Tony’s on the table, right next to the salt and pepper. Honestly, this law would be way more effective in states outside of Louisiana so let’s just make this a federal law and put this baby to bed.

‘Bulls Balls’ Hanging From Vehicles

Bulls Balls

We really don’t have any particular reason why this should be outlawed other than we really don’t see any particular reason why anyone would want a set of bull’s testicles hanging in the faces of the general public. Stop lights are aggravating enough by themselves.

Work On Lundi Gras / Ash Wednesday

Rusty Costanza, Getty Images

In addition to fact that we know so many people who have actually QUIT their job for not being allowed to have off for Mardi Gras, these may be the two least productive days of the year for any business. Close the doors, grab some King Cake and a cold drink, and we’ll worry about work on Thursday.

‘Faking’ A Cajun Accent

Russell Lee, Getty Images

Unless you were born with it, grew up with it, and still have it – it’s not funny. Period.

Scheduling Any Life Event During A Saints / Cajuns / Tigers Football Game

saints cajuns tigers
Chris Graythen, Ronald Martinez, Getty Images

If you’ve ever been obligated to attend a wedding, birthday party or any other life event during a Saints, Tigers or Cajuns game; you already know that it’s damn near impossible to pretend to be interested in what’s going on and not check your phone every 2 minutes for updates on the game. This law would make sure no one would be subjected to that type of excruciating situation ever again.

Other than King Cakes without babies, unnecessary pluralization, and humidity – that’s about all we’ve got. If you agree with our list and/or it made you laugh, press those blue buttons below and share it with someone who will also get a kick out of it.

NEXT: FAKE NEWS STORY CLAIMS 'TWERKING' IS ILLEGAL IN DEQUINCY, LA

More From Hot 107.9

Best of the Web

Leave a Comment

It appears that you already have an account created within our VIP network of sites on . To keep your points and personal information safe, we need to verify that it's really you. To activate your account, please confirm your password. When you have confirmed your password, you will be able to log in through Facebook on both sites.

Forgot your password?

*Please note that your points, prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

It appears that you already have an account on this site associated with . To connect your existing account with your Facebook account, just click on the account activation button below. You will maintain your existing profile and VIP program points. After you do this, you will be able to always log in to http://1079ishot.com using your Facebook account.

*Please note that your points, prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

Please fill out the information below to help us provide you a better experience.

Register on HOT 107.9 quickly by logging in with your Facebook account. It's just as secure, and no password to remember!

Not a Member? Sign Up Here

Register on HOT 107.9 quickly by logging in with your Facebook account. It's just as secure, and no password to remember!