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“Shittens”: NSFW Moist Wipes For People Who Don’t Have Time For Crap


Parenting is no walk in the park, and having to deal with a lot of crap comes with the job – both literally, and figuratively speaking. Enter “Shittens”, the disposable mitten-shaped moist wipe that will ensure that you never get caught “brown-handed.”

While “Shittens” seems like something straight out of an SNL skit, they are indeed a very real company with a very real product, aimed at protecting your hands while “tending to the dirty deed.”

The magnificent advantages of “Shittens” aren’t just limited to babies. Their official website boasts their product for use on pets, grandparents, and of course, YOU.

How many times have you taken one of those substandard wet wipes to the posterior of a child, risking major contamination from that flailing poop cloth? And how many times has your dog’s “number two” been a little closer to a number one “and a half”, requiring a deadly grab & pull maneuver with whatever’s laying around? Enough is enough!

Their products have been features on major websites like Buzzfeed, as well as popular programs like Tosh.o and The Howard Stern Show.

To everyone who doesn’t have time for crap: You’re welcome.


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