Ryan Anderson is a humorist and writer with a degree in journalism and philosophy that just sits in a box in his attic. You can read more of his musings here: http://www.twitter.com/kolchak
Ryan Anderson
Chris Brown Says He Has a First Amendment Right to Make His House as Ugly as He Wants
Chris Brown is fighting back against the city of Los Angeles, which is trying to make Breezy remove the bizarre Sid and Marty Krofft creatures he spray painted onto his property that subsequently scared the hell out of all the neighborhood children (and all the grownups afraid of plummeting property values).
Vivid Bought Joe Francis’ Sex Tape, But (Thankfully) We’ll Never See It
Last time we heard from professional toolkit Joe Francis, someone had stolen his girlfriend Abbey Wilson's iPad and began peddling footage of the two bumping uglies, causing Francis to freak out (ironic, given how the 'Girls Gone Wild' honcho made his fortune).
But Steve Hirsch -- the Vivid Entertainment founder who previously bought Farrah Abraham's sex tape porno -- came to Joe's rescue.
Read Mo
Charlie Sheen Calls Farrah Abraham a ‘Desperate Guzzler of Stagnant Douche Agua’
As we reported yesterday, Farrah Abraham and Charlie Sheen have been texting, and she proudly showed TMZ proof of such.
But Charlie was none too pleased about her revelation, and he's now penned an acidic missive to the teen mom that seeks to put her back in her place. Wherever that may be.
Farrah Abraham + Charlie Sheen Are Texting About Playdates Now [PHOTOS]
Looks like Farrah Abraham is one step closer to becoming a goddess, because she's officially been texting Charlie Sheen for a month now.
Justin Bieber + Miley Cyrus May or May Not Be Hooking Up [VIDEO]
In a chain of events that some feel brings to mind the harbingers of death in the book of Revelation, Miley Cyrus and Justin Bieber were spotted canoodling at a Los Angeles hot spot over the weekend before leaving together.
His Holiness Kanye West Demands You Not Speak In His Presence [VIDEO]
Paparazzos are sometimes annoying or aggressive. A photog who caught up with Kanye West (en route to cure a leper, probs) in New York this weekend was being neither -- but that didn't stop Yeezus from throwing a holy hissy fit.
Take That, Europe: Kanye West + Kim Kardashian Might Be Moving to France [VIDEO]
Kanye West has done his best to avoid both most of the Kardashian clan and the paparazzi, occasionally losing brain cells in the process. But with no results, he's been forced to up the ante -- possibly relocating squeeze Kim Kardashian and their daughter Khristy to France.
Justin Bieber Steals a Paparazzo’s Camera, Continues His Rapid Descent into Thugdom [AUDIO]
Justin Bieber is back to his old tricks again, flipping out on a paparazzo for doing his job and ordering his goons to steal the man's camera like a respectable artist would.
Farrah Abraham Isn’t Allowed to Drink for the Next Six Months
As we told you previously, Farrah Abraham pled guilty to her Nebraska DUI charges. But now the horrific terms of her deal are coming to light: She won't be able to booze it up for a full six months.
Some Dude Slashed His Wrists in Front of the ‘Today’ Show Audience [PHOTO, VIDEO]
A man attempted to commit suicide -- or at least garner a lot of attention -- in front of a live taping of the 'Today' show. And while the program has been in a ratings slump, this probably wasn't what it had to mind to fix that.
Kim Kardashian + Kris Humphries Are (Finally) Officially Divorced
A year and a half after separating and countless tumultuous legal battles later, Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries are finally divorced.
Farrah Abraham Was Largely Ignored at a Porn Convention [VIDEOS]
Farrah Abraham showed up to Exxxotica 2013 in Fort Lauderdale this weekend to hawk signed copies of that video where she let James Deen pick the lock on her backdoor, and she was largely left alone.
Some Perv Pretended to be One Direction’s Harry Styles to Solicit Minors for Sex
The internet has the potential to be an amazing -- or a terrifying -- place. In the case of John Eastman, it's super creepy.
Justin Bieber Once Again Accused of Being Someone’s Baby Daddy
Remember when Mariah Yeater claimed she was impregnated by Justin Bieber during a magical backstage tryst before she was proven a trashy little gold digger and faded into obscurity?
Get ready for that to happen again.
John Mayer + Katy Perry ‘Seem to Be Back Together’ at Her Memorial Day Party
Katy Perry has been a busy lady. In between platonic wedding-watching with Robert Pattinson, she managed to throw an A-list Memorial Day party -- and one of her invited guests was off-and-on boyfriend John Mayer.
Cue the "oh no, not again" eye rolling.
Morgan Freeman Falls Asleep Mid-Interview – But Has an Epic Excuse for Doing It [VIDEO]
Morgan Freeman may be known for his stellar narration skills, but earlier this week he seemed more content narrating his own dreams -- because he nodded off in the middle of an interview.
Or did he?
Carmen Electra’s New Single Challenges You To A Genitalia Measuring Competition
Once upon a time, Carmen Electra was a Prince protegee. Since then, she's been more of an actress and all-around hot babe than a singer -- but with the release of her new single, 'Bigger D-ck,' all that could change.
Farrah Abraham Did an Interview and Basically Called Herself a Prostitute [VIDEO]
Farrah Abraham, famous teen mom of the "backdoor" variety, has finally opened up (ha!) about her life, sexual proclivities, and crippling ennui.
Kanye West Rants He’s the ‘Worst Kind Of Celebrity’ + Very Serious About It [NSFW VIDEO]
Kanye West has things to say. And because he's a tortured artist, he can't do it in a press release or interview. He won't be restrained by the man.
So instead, he yells auto-tuned things to his audiences between songs at concerts.
Kim Kardashian’s Car Is Nearly Hit By a Paparazzo She Probably Called Herself
Kim Kardashian was livid last night after a close encounter with paparazzi, taking to Twitter to vent her frustration.