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7 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Make Fun Of New Orleans For Choosing The Pelican As Their New Mascot

New Orleans Hornets Announce Name Change To Pelicans
Stacy Revere, Getty Images

Well, they said it might happen, and it did. The New Orleans Hornets have changed their name and will now be known as the New Orleans Pelicans. Yeah, I said Pelicans – don’t laugh. The Pelicans represent Louisiana as the state bird, but even Louisianians are having a hearty laugh at the name-change.

Hold your laughter though – because I don’t think you’re privy to just how bad a** pelicans really are.

Deadspin recently pointed out that while most folks are sneering at the idea of a pelican holding any form of intimidation – the truth is, they don’t know what they’re talking about. Even I will admit, at first I wondered how anyone could possibly take us serious with a name like “the Pelicans.” Could you imagine the team introduction?

Giiiiiiive IT UP for YOUR New Orrleeeeannnnnnnnnnnnns PEL-I-CANNNNNNNNNNS!!!!!

I just can’t fathom how that phrase would have any type of power when it could come to lifting people out of their seats. But as I began to dig deeper into Deadspin’s article, I realized that pelicans were actually really awesome! I know that doesn’t even sound right, but allow me to share with you why this seemingly clumsy bird could end up being one of the most fierce mascots in the NBA.

1. Pelicans are hypercarnivores

David McNew, Getty Images

Unlike other birds, who eat things like bugs and stuff, pelicans eat meat. As a matter of fact, they are hypercarnivores, meaning they eat meat, and ONLY meat. And unlike eagles and falcons – who usually scavenge someone else’s kill – pelicans crave warm flesh, so they handle their own business in the killing department.

2. Pelicans are raptors, who dive to catch their prey

David McNew, Getty Images

Thats right. I said “dive.” The White Pelican is known for gracefully dipping its head underwater to scoop out fish, but our Louisiana state bird is the Brown Pelican – and Brown Pelicans are the only species of pelican that dives to catch its prey. Basically, what I’m saying is that we are talking about raptors in the sky.

3. Pelicans have insanely good eyesight

Dan Kitwood, Getty Images

Before pelicans make their infamous kill dive, they are able to see their prey beneath the water’s surface from 60 feet in the sky. That means that fish literally never see it coming before they are eaten… alive.

4. Pelicans get their grub on

Justin Sullivan, Getty Images

Pelicans eat up to four pounds of fish per day. This is amazing, because they normally weigh around eight pounds. They are relentless, and will even eat baby ducklings, and they will do it in front of kids.

5. Pelicans are perfect, because nature said so

David McNew, Getty Images

Most animals have evolved into what we know them as today – except pelicans. They have had the same bill for 30 million years. When you are a feathered master of murder like the pelican, even evolution doesn’t eff with you.

6. Pelicans work well in groups

David McNew, Getty Images

Basketball teams count on teamwork, and thats exactly what pelicans represent to the fullest. They are known to practice “cooperative fishing,” where they lure fish into a central area, they take turns diving in to pick them off. They are even known to draw their own blood to feed their young.

7. Pelicans are just as good on defense, as they are on offense

Fox Photos, Getty Images

We have clearly established their killing potential, but pelicans are also great on defense. Deadspin reported on a story from 1910 where three pelicans at the Central Park Zoo managed to beat a “marauding weasel” to death after it came looking for trouble in a pigeon coop. Even after the weasel was dead, the pelicans were still jabbing their bills at it. Yeah. It got that real.

In case thats not convincing enough as to why the Pelicans aren’t nearly as bad as they may sound, check out this montage of pelicans attacking stuff, including humans.

[via Deadspin]

 

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