Contact Us

Woman Arrested For Falling Asleep ‘Spread Eagle’ On Front Porch

Photo courtesy of Polk County Jail

Few of us would mind if a woman — accidentally locked out onto her front porch naked — decided to take the opportunity to “get some sun” and happened to fall asleep in a “compromising” position.  That is, until we learn that the narcoleptic tanning nude is a 56-year-old woman. 

Officers found Michelle Knutson of St. Croix Falls, Wisconsin “completely naked with her legs open exposing her genitals to passing cars and pedestrian traffic,” according to a police report.  She claimed to have been walking around naked (a common practice for her) and wandered out onto her porch, not realizing the door was locked. She blames her husband though he claims he had nothing to do with the whole situation.

The responding officer noted a number of items on the porch including a towel with which she could have covered herself and, oh yeah, that fact that the back door was unlocked. Knutson seemed intoxicated and refused a breath test.  She was arrested on suspicion of lewd/lascivious behavior and later released.

So ladies, the lesson is: if you’re ever drunk and naked and you can’t come in the front, always try the back door.

NEXT: Testicle Eating Fish Found In Illinois Lake

Best of Hot 107.9

Recommended For You

Around the Web

It appears that you already have an account created within our VIP network of sites on . To keep your personal information safe, we need to verify that it's really you. To activate your account, please confirm your password. When you have confirmed your password, you will be able to log in through Facebook on both sites.

Forgot your password?

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

It appears that you already have an account on this site associated with . To connect your existing account just click on the account activation button below. You will maintain your existing VIP profile. After you do this, you will be able to always log in to http://1079ishot.com using your original account information.

*Please note that your prizes and activities will not be shared between programs within our VIP network.

Please fill out the information below to help us provide you a better experience.

(Forgot your password?)

Not a member? Sign up here

Sign up for Friends with Benefits quickly by connecting your Facebook account. It's just as secure and no password to remember!

Sign up to have exclusive Friends with Benefits contests, events, coupons, presales, and much more delivered to you for FREE.